- When someone is asking about your race, what is the best way to approach that question?
I don’t get asked about race. I am fair skinned, and I am sure everyone assumes I am simply Caucasian. I get it. I think we are accustomed to sizing folks up within a split second to move through our day. To me, it is more about taking the time to be observant, be curious about those around us. If someone were to ask me about my background, I’d want them to ask me in an open manner such as, “what was growing up like?” or “tell me more about your background?”
What you wish people knew about being multiracial/multicultural?
I don’t know if it’s like this for everyone and it’s different to straddle two different cultures. I am not seen as Hispanic and yet this is the side of me, I most identify as. I am not seen outwardly as Hispanic. I think it’s important for folks to remember that Hispanics and Latinas come in all shades and sizes! Growing up I was closer to my dad’s family and the mannerisms of family are different in Hispanic families. It’s the food, the words, the unspoken norms of how you interact, and the cultural celebrations. It is hard at times to know how you fit in on either side, not in my family, but culturally.
What you wish people would stop doing?
This might sound repetitive and at the end of the day, I wish folks would stop assuming I am only one thing based on what they can see. If they look harder, they will see features that are found in many who inhabit the Southwest (hair, teeth, skin, cheekbones etc.). Many Hispanics are a mix of Latin, Indigenous, and or Spanish descent based on the history of colonization and political land boundaries. Take a moment and be curious instead of checking a box that I fit into.
Folks assume they are safe to make comments or jokes that are unsavory about immigration, brown people, or Mexicans around me. I find it hurtful and a simplistic narrow view. Yes, this has happened and happened at work! The result is I don’t want to be around them and sometimes confrontation. It’s painful to know and experience when those you love, those who are brown skinned, face this on a regular basis.
Some may laugh when they read this…. And hey, stop thinking I am my dad’s wife! We have the same smile and laugh folks. The idea grosses me out!
How do you feel included?
I feel included when people see me as me and take interest. I am not one thing. Get to know me and invite me in by sharing who you are too. Be open and I’ll be open. Listen and I’ll listen too.
What is your favorite part of your Hispanic heritage? What culturally makes you proud? Any family traditions on your dad’s side that you love?
One of my favorite things growing up was being called, “meja” or “mijita” by grandparents and family. This affectionate term brings a smile to my face thinking of them. Today, I say this to my niece and there is a connection not only to my family, but to my culture I get to express.
Some of my favorite parts of my Hispanic heritage are centered around food and the closeness of family. My grandparents’ home was always open and always the gathering place from holidays to weekly weekend meals together. I love that at any point I could open my grandma’s fridge and there would be beans and tortillas (this was true of any of my Auntie’s homes too). Today, I make beans nearly every week. At Thanksgiving, I ate red chili over my mashed potatoes. As an adult, I make my chili the next day for leftovers. As a tradition, we have tamales on Christmas Eve. I love them and love that my teenager also loves them and expects them at the holidays too! Every fall, we always put up our green chilis for winter. This family tradition includes my parents, siblings, and my own family. It marks the passing of another year and reminds us of the meals to come. This is making me hungry just thinking of it. 😊
I think you can read through my answers and see the common thread that family is important and one aspect that has been instilled as part of my heritage. It is the respect for elders, the closeness, and the connection with your intimate and extended family that is prevalent and sacred.
Maureen “Mo” Berkner Boyt, is the moxie behind The Moxie Exchange. She is a thought-leader in DEI and has brought the most innovative product in the space to market. Maureen has spent over 25 years helping organizations grow by creating inclusive workplaces where talented people can thrive. People around the world are using the tools she created to build diverse and inclusive cultures in their organizations. Maureen holds a Master’s Degree in Organizational Development and is a published author and frequently requested speaker, teaching top organizations how to improve their bottom line by expanding their footprint in DEI. Her Disrupt HR Talk, Hack Your Biased Brain, is one of the most popular talks of the movement. Mo is a natural leader, entrepreneur, and dynamic educator who is an expert on getting people to think big, take action and move the dial on driving results for themselves and their teams.